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Mile Chai Jewish
Books |
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Under the Table &
How to Get Up
Jewish Pathways of Spiritual Growth
by Avraham Greenbaum
Size: 21 x 14 cm.
312 pages. Softcover
ISBN # 0-930213-39-4 |
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"The king's son
had gone crazy. He thought he was a turkey. He felt he had to
sit naked under the table and eat crumbs. None of the doctors
could do anything for him… Until a mysterious Wise Man
appeared, sat down right next to the Prince, and cured him in
a simple and highly original way."
Read and loved by many thousands, this compelling modern
classic uses Rabbi Nachman's parable of the Turkey-Prince as a
framework to explain a chassidic spiritual pathway that
includes faith, positive thinking, goal achievement,
harnessing the power of words, caring for the body, breathing,
meditation, prayer, song, dance, joy… and friendship.
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Extracts from Under the
Table |
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The Parable of the Turkey
Prince • The Challenge of Being Yourself • Meaning of the Turkey Parable
• The Wise Man and his cure • The Art of Sitting • Eating • Breathing •
Prayer
The Parable of the Turkey Prince
Once the king's son went mad. He thought he was a turkey. He felt
compelled to sit under the table without any clothes on, pulling at bits
of bread and bones like a turkey. None of the doctors could do anything
to help him or cure him, and they gave up in despair. The king was very
sad...
Until a Wise Man came and said, "I can cure him."
What did the Wise Man do? He took off all his clothes, and sat down
naked under the table next to the king's son, and also pulled at crumbs
and bones.
The Prince asked him, "Who are you and what are you doing here?"
"And what are you doing here?" he replied.
"I am a turkey," said the Prince.
"Well I'm also a turkey," said the Wise Man.
The two of them sat there together like this for some time, until they
were used to one another.
Then the Wise Man gave a sign, and they threw them shirts. The Wise
Man-Turkey said to the king's son, "Do you think a turkey can't wear a
shirt? You can wear a shirt and still be a turkey."
The two of them put on shirts.
After a while he gave another sign and they threw them some trousers.
Again the Wise Man said, "Do you think if you wear trousers you can't be
a turkey?" They put on the trousers.
One by one they put on the rest of their clothes in the same way.
Afterwards, the Wise Man gave a sign and they put down human food from
the table. The Wise Man said to the Prince, "Do you think if you eat
good food you can't be a turkey any more? You can eat this food and
still be a turkey." They ate.
Then he said to him, "Do you think a turkey has to sit under the table?
You can be a turkey and sit up at the table."
This was how the Wise Man dealt with the Prince, until in the end he
cured him completely.
•
The challenge of being yourself
Have you ever wished you could live up to your highest ideals, only to
look at your shortcomings and failures and conclude that you'll probably
never succeed?
The moral of the tale of the Turkey-Prince is that you can succeed, and
the story shows you how. We all have two sides to us, the Prince (or
Princess) and the Turkey. The Prince is the higher self, or soul - the
child of God, which we all are. The Prince is the potential self, the
person we can be if we learn the right way to nurture ourselves and
grow. There are practically no limits to the levels of development
within our grasp. Every soul is unique, and each one of us has the power
to realize our potential in our own unique way.
The Turkey is the lower self, the side that is averse to sacrifice, hard
work and effort, preferring easy solutions and instant pleasures. God
gives everyone a Turkey self, not because He wants us to follow its
demands, but in order to challenge us. The Turkey side makes it harder
to be the Prince or Princess we should be - and the reward for
succeeding is therefore greater.
The Turkey's main strength is its stubbornness. Day after day it pushes
its way into our minds and hearts. How often do we know exactly what we
ought or ought not to do, only to find ourselves driven into acting in
the most self-defeating and destructive ways! Each time we follow the
Turkey it becomes all the more entrenched, while the Prince grows
discouraged and goes further and further underground. The resulting
depression only makes us give in to the Turkey even more.
There are all manner of "doctors" offering advice about what we should
do with our lives. There are innumerable books on self-help and
self-improvement. How many programs have all of us started, then
abandoned less than half-way along? The real question is: even when you
know what you ought to do to take yourself in hand, how do you get
yourself to actually do it? How do you carry it through to the end? This
is what the Wise Man in the story comes to teach us.
The story of the Turkey-Prince may be amusing, but the madness it
depicts is no laughing matter. The Rabbis characterize the madman as
someone who loses everything he is given (Chagigah 4a). The madness of
the Turkey-Prince is that he is losing the most precious gift he has:
his soul. The soul is life, eternal life. This kind of madness is sheer
self-destruction.
After death comes the reckoning. What did we spend our life running
after? Crumbs and bones? What are we going to be left with? Will we let
ourselves get away with being less than we could be? This life is our
one chance for self-realization. What are we going to do with it?
"On the day of reckoning," said the famous Chassid, Reb Zusya, "when
they ask me, `Why weren't you like Abraham, Isaac and Jacob?' I won't be
afraid. But when they ask me, `Why weren't you like Zusya?' - that's
when I'll be afraid."
The meaning of the Turkey parable
The situation of the Turkey-Prince under the table is a metaphor for our
situation in This World - the world we live in for our hundred and
twenty years, the world we can see, feel, hear, smell and taste all
around us, with the entire array of mineral, vegetable, animal and human
forms it contains: the skies, the planets, the stars and heavenly
bodies, and outer space stretching to who knows where.
From our perspective, the material, sensible world may seem like an
independent, self-existing realm. It is impossible to see indisputable
evidence of a higher power controlling or influencing events. The
universe appears to run according to its own rules - the laws of nature,
probability, etc. We ourselves may be aware that our behavior is to a
large extent determined by circumstances beyond our control: our
physical nature, our upbringing and environment etc. At the same time,
over wide areas, we have the freedom to act as we wish. When we want to
lift up a hand, we just do. We feel like independent, autonomous beings.
Yet in telling us that, "In the beginning God created..." (Genesis 1:1)
the Torah is teaching us that this world is not independent and
self-existing. The material world we experience through our five senses
is far from being the sum total of what exists. In reality it is a
created world, the lowest of an entire system of interconnected
worlds-upon-worlds, which together make up the creation. They are the
kingdom of God. He created them all.
The paradox of creation is that nothing exists without God, yet God
willed into being a realm that appears to exist independently. Why?
Our Sages explain that God is intrinsically good. The essence of
goodness is to do good to others. Accordingly, God's purpose in the
creation was to bring forth creatures who would be the recipients of His
goodness.
Since God Himself is the only true good, His purpose would only be
accomplished through bestowing His own perfect goodness upon His
creatures. He therefore arranged the creation in a way that would give
created beings the opportunity to attach themselves to God Himself, the
ultimate good, as fully as possible. Although created beings are unable
to attain God's own perfection, they can share in it through attachment
to Him on every level of their being. The creature that was created to
be the receiver of this goodness is man.
God could have granted man His goodness as an outright gift. However, in
order to have complete enjoyment of the good, the recipient must be its
master. In other words, he must have worked to earn perfection for
himself, rather than receiving it as a complimentary gift. The creation
of man therefore entailed the creation of a system whereby man could
earn his connection with God of his own free will and through his own
efforts.
This was accomplished by constructing a realm that contains abundant
opportunities to pursue Godly perfection, side by side with other
opportunities that detract from that pursuit. Man is placed in this
realm for a specific period of time to work. By struggling to embrace
Godliness and striving toward perfection, while avoiding everything that
might lure him away from them, man earns his closeness to God through
his own efforts. He can then enjoy the pleasure of God's goodness in an
ensuing period of reward.
Godliness is intrinsically good. Anything which pulls one away from
Godliness is evil, and there undesirable. However, if this were perfectly
evident to man during his period of work and effort, there would be no
challenge. It would be obvious that Godliness is the only goal worth
pursuing. In order to provide the challenge, it was necessary that God's
true goodness should be somewhat concealed from man during this period
of work, while evil should possess an attraction of its own, making it a
plausible choice. God is all-powerful, and therefore able to create evil
and even make it appear attractive.
Thus God brought This World into being - a world offering us abundant
possibilities either to draw ourselves into a closer connection with
God, or to embrace evil and become separate from Him. We are given
complete freedom of choice. Although in fact God is everywhere, this
world is designed in such a way as to conceal Godliness. On the surface,
the attractions of evil may seem as great as those of good. Our mission
in this world is to uncover the Godly possibilities that are present by
learning to distinguish between true good and evil: we must reject the
evil and embrace the good, so as to incorporate Godliness into our very
souls. The labor itself gives us a taste of God, and then, after our
allotted time in this world, we go on to enjoy the fruits of our efforts
in the World to Come.
In the parable of the Turkey-Prince, This World is represented by the
shadowy realm in which the Prince is sitting, down there under the
table. Although his little world is an integral part of the court, to
the Prince it seems completely independent and separate. This is because
his view of the court is almost completely blocked by the tablecloth.
Even the legs and feet and other shapes that are visible from his
unusual perspective are so bizarre-looking as to be incomprehensible. In
the same way, the entire creation is God's kingdom. This World is an
integral part of it, and Godliness is everywhere.
But here in This World our view is distorted. This is because in order
to bring it into being, God concealed Himself with veil after veil,
screening off the light so as to create the conditions of man's test.
The Prince's clothes are strewn all around. If he would only put them
on, he could be part of the court and enjoy all the privileges and
pleasures that are his due. In the same way, This World is full of
opportunities to lift ourselves into a closer connection with God - if
we would only recognize and embrace them. But just as the Turkey-Prince
finds the crumbs and bones far more relevant and satisfying, so we are
apt to be much more interested and involved in the great multitude of
highly attractive alternatives all around us.
The Wise Man and his cure
Many lessons can be gleaned from every word and move of the Wise man.
Humility
In a sense, the Wise Man doesn't have a personality. He seems to show up
out of nowhere. He puts aside his own clothes of splendor, sacrificing
his dignity in order to lower himself to the very place where the Prince
is. Even when the Prince asks him who he is, he side-steps the question.
The Wise Man is the model of self-effacement. The foundation of his
wisdom is humility. "Wisdom comes out of nothingness" (Job 28:12).
Obviously this does not mean that wisdom comes from sitting around idly
doing nothing. It comes to teach us that in order to open ourselves to
genuine wisdom, we have to quieten the lower self that is constantly
pushing itself forward, saying "ANiY" - "I... me... my...." We have to
turn ANiY into AYiN - nothingness.
People have all kinds of ideas and theories of their own, but real
wisdom begins with the admission that we ourselves ultimately know
nothing. We can never be certain whether or not we are right in what we
think. God alone knows the truth. God alone knows what is really good
for us. It follows that God's Wisdom - the Torah - is the only certain
guide in life. To solve our Turkey problems, the first thing we need is
the humility to admit that we have to turn to the Torah and its teachers
for help and guidance.
Life is so rich in opportunities of every kind, especially for spiritual
growth and deepening our connection with God. However, much of the time
we simply do not see these opportunities because our existing
involvements and preconceptions stand in the way. Rather than always
trying to force reality to fit into a rigid framework of existing views
and opinions, learn to avoid hasty conclusions about people and
circumstances and listen for the messages life is trying to give you.
Faith
The Wise Man comes along and boldly announces: "I can cure the Prince."
What makes him so confident? All the other doctors had tried and failed.
How can he be so optimistic? The Wise Man's optimism is an off-shoot of
his humility. When he says "I can cure him," he does not mean this in
the egotistical sense of "through my strength and the power of my hands"
(Deuteronomy 8:17). The Wise Man knows that no matter what he himself
may do, everything depends upon God. When the Wise Man says "I," it is
as one who is always seeking to efface his own ego and give himself and
all his faculties to God's service. Any power he possesses is the power
of the Torah, which is God's supreme wisdom. The Wise Man has complete
faith in God and the Torah. This is what gives him his confidence.
Indeed, God is completely dependable. God wants good. And God has the
power to do anything. God wants the Prince - the soul - cured, and God
has a way to make even what seems impossible possible. "Even when things
seem to be at their worst, there is a way that the situation can turn
around to one's full advantage" (Rebbe Nachman).
We too must believe that no matter what condition we may have fallen to,
God's real desire is that we should reach our complete fulfillment. We
must have faith that God has the power to bring us to it even with our
many flaws and weaknesses, even if until now we may have failed time
after time. We must have faith in the power of the Torah, and trust that
by following its pathways we will come to true goodness and happiness.
Finding the Good
How many doctors and psychiatrists look over at their patients from
their high places and chillingly invite them to "tell me about your
problems." Not so the Wise Man. In his humility, he takes himself right
down to where the Prince is, there under the table. The Wise Man will
only be able to cure the Prince when he can evoke a response from his
buried inner self. To do this, the Wise Man must first get to the truth
of the Prince's situation. The Wise Man does not spin lofty theories
about it. He projects himself directly into it, empathizing with the
Prince in every way he can. The Wise Man removes his own "clothes" - his
preconceptions and prejudgments - sits down next to the Prince, and
starts getting to know him.
The honest search for truth is the key to redemption. It is no good
living with illusions about ourselves. In order to achieve anything in
life, we have to be realistic. One of the most important things we can
learn from the Wise Man is how to be truthful. If the Wise Man had
looked at nothing but the pathetic external appearance of the naked
Prince, squealing like a Turkey and grobbing around in the dirt, he
might well have thrown his hands up in despair, just like the other
doctors. But because of his faith in God's goodness, he refuses to be
discouraged by surface appearances, and determinedly searches for the
good in the Prince. The Wise Man knows that beneath his Turkey exterior,
the Prince's royal essence is unchanged, albeit hidden. All that is
needed is to awaken it, gently but surely.
We need this same faith when we look at ourselves. We may see much that
we do not like, but we must also search for the underlying good within
us. We must be honest with ourselves about ourselves, but the truth does
not have to hurt. Humility does not mean you have to eye yourself
scathingly, condemning yourself and everything you do as worthless. True
humility is to acknowledge your real worth and know that it is God's
gift to you. God created everything, and God is good. Therefore good is
to be found everywhere and in every person. No one is ever so far gone
as to be beyond redemption.
Similarly, when thinking about the various problems you face, remember
that they must have good in them somewhere. God has the power to turn
everything around to your advantage. While it is foolish to minimize
genuine difficulties, you should try to search for the positive factors
as well. If things go against you, or your efforts seem to be
frustrated, don't be discouraged. If what you want is God's will,
failure is only a preparation for success: take it as a sign that you
should make greater efforts. And if, after all your efforts, you still
do not succeed, have faith that whatever God wants will ultimately be
for the best.
Patience
The Wise Man's faith in God gives him one of the most important
qualities he needs to cure the Prince: patience. Since he is sure God is
good and constantly helping, the Wise Man does not insist on having
things exactly the way he might want them to be. He is content to accept
things the way God wants them to be.
Right now the Prince is thinking and acting like a Turkey. Okay. That's
the way it is. Moaning about the situation, or wishing it were
different, won't help. The question is: what practical steps can be
taken to bring the situation nearer to the way we would like it to be.
What you can change, change. What you cannot, live with as best you can,
until such time as you can do something about it.
People often feel that if they cannot achieve everything they want, it
is not worth trying to achieve anything. This is a mistake. Things do
not have to be "all or nothing." The Wise Man is prepared to live with
imperfection even while striving to make progress. Things can be
"both... and..." "You can wear a shirt and still be a Turkey." "You can
wear trousers and still be a Turkey." "You can eat good food and still
be a Turkey."
Rebbe Nachman does not waste a single word in telling this
story, so it is noteworthy that he repeats this idea three times. It is
one of the most important lessons of the whole story.
When you want to change yourself in any way, be realistic about what you
are capable of right now and what is presently beyond you. Be patient
with yourself and go steadily. You may be very ambitious, but it is
impossible to transform yourself all in one step. If you undertake a
heavier load than you can manage, you may end up accomplishing nothing.
If you try to change too many things in your life at once, you may not
be able to cope with all the changes, and risk ending up worse off than
when you started. To make genuine progress, be content to take modest,
steady steps, one after the other. This is the way to make solid gains
and build up your strength.
As you try to change, you are likely to see aspects of "the old you"
surfacing repeatedly. Don't let this discourage you. Carry on with your
work in the areas you have decided to concentrate on for the time being.
Rather than allow yourself to be depressed because some of what you want
to shed still clings to you, take delight in the new, better you that is
emerging.
Simplicity
All the other doctors had failed. Perhaps some of them had been willing
to compromise and settle for less than a complete recovery for the
Prince. Even so, none of them had been able to do anything for him. The
Wise Man, on the other hand, wanted nothing less than perfection. He was
determined to cure the Prince completely. Despite his patience and
willingness to accept slow, gradual improvement, the Wise Man was the
most ambitious of all. How did he succeed?
Essentially, through simplicity. Simplicity is another facet of
humility. One admits one's limitations, and instead of attempting things
that are too difficult, one only ever tries to take simple steps. Said
Rebbe Nachman: "The greatest art of all is to be simple" (Likutey
Moharan II:44).
Breaking the Whole into Small Parts
Sometimes our personalities are like a heavy stone. We are asked to lift
up our hearts and bring Godly awareness into every aspect of our being.
"Know this day and take to your heart that HaShem is the only God in
heaven above and on the earth below" (Deuteronomy 4:39). But the heart
is a "heart of stone" (Ezekiel 36:26). The only way to lift up the heart
is by taking a hammer, as it were, and breaking our major goals,
ambitions and projects into small, practicable tasks.
The Wise Man wanted to cure the Turkey-Prince completely. His ultimate
goal was perfection. But when he contemplated his goal he said to
himself, "That's impossible to achieve all at once. It involves so much,
it's overwhelming. I am unable to do hard, complicated things. I can
only do simple, easy things. I have to break the long-term goal into
small, manageable steps."
The Wise Man analyzes the ultimate goal into its component sub- and
sub-sub-goals, and works out an order of priorities. What will it mean
for the Prince to be cured? He must behave normally, sitting up at the
table. To sit up at the table will involve eating the royal food and
wearing his royal clothes.
The first goal, then, is to get the Prince to put his clothes on. But
that's still too complicated. You'll never get him to put on all his
clothes in one go. This sub-goal must also be divided into its component
parts. The Prince has to put on his shirt, his trousers, his socks, his
shoes... The Wise Man breaks everything down into simple, manageable,
steps, which he then proceeds to take one by one. "He put on a shirt."
True, you must be patient and wait when necessary. But when the time is
ripe you have to act. People often sit doing nothing because the task
they face seems so forbidding. Simplify larger goals into a series of
small, easy steps. What is the next step? Go ahead and take it.
Time
To cure the Prince, the Wise Man stopped everything else he may have
been doing and made the necessary time. Not that he wasted time. When
the moment came for him to act - to put on the shirt and the trousers,
or eat the royal food - he went in like an arrow and did what he had to
do. But one of the most important parts of the whole cure was to get to
know the Prince intimately and establish a good working relationship
with him. This could only be achieved by sitting with him patiently for
lengthy periods without being in any hurry to get up.
No matter what you want to accomplish in life - whether a specific task
or the ultimate goal of finding fulfillment and happiness - you must
give it time. Not only the time required to take whatever practical
steps may be necessary. Even more important is the time you invest
working out which steps to take and how you are going to achieve what
you want.
People have all kinds of ideas about things they would like to achieve,
ranging from simple, everyday goals to grandiose, far-reaching
ambitions. Many of our ideas are completely unrealistic - and we may
know it. They are fantasies which will never materialize: they never
leave the realm of thought. Others may be practicable. Potentially they
could be realized. We may even want to realize them very much, or think
we do. Yet for some reason we never succeed. They never become actual.
Someit doesn't matter. Ideas are free! They can be fun! But what if the
goals are important?
Success means making the transition from potential to actual. The goal
starts off as an idea. It may be clear or vague. To make it actual, the
idea has to be developed and acted on. What is the key to success? Many
of the things we do in our lives are quite routine: we don't need to
think too much about them. Other things require a more conscious effort.
This is especially the case if we want to change something - whether in
ourselves or in the outside world - or create something new. The more
ambitious the goal, the more likely it will require a conscious effort.
Just wanting to succeed is not enough. Wishing for something will not
bring it about. What is the difference between wishing and willing?
There is no magic about willpower. Some people manage to get things
done. It is not that they have some mysterious power of wanting which
automatically makes their goals come about. They work. But hard work
alone is not sufficient. In order for our efforts to succeed, they have
to be properly attuned to the goal we are aiming for. We have to be
clear what our goal really is. Time, energy and other resources are all
limited. To achieve one goal may necessitate giving up others. We may
have to moderate some of our desires and ambitions. Having decided on
the goal, we then have to take account of all the relevant
circumstances, and work out exactly what we will have to do, step by
step, in order to accomplish it. All this requires careful thought and
planning. And this takes time. Taking the time to do this will only save
you time in the long run.
Time is precious. We all know that. Time is life. We all have to die,
and our time in this life is limited. We want to make the most of it. In
fact, we may want to get so much out of it that we feel we are too busy
to be able to stop for a moment to think about how we're using our time.
The result? How often do we get ourselves into situations which cause us
the most colossal wastes of time, leaving us frustrated and
disappointed? Sometimes a real crisis develops, finally forcing us to
try to work things out. Only by then it could be too late. Nobody knows
how long he will be healthy or when he will die.Why wait? Time is more
precious than money. Time is love. All the good ideas in the world will
not help you unless you take the time to put them into practice. Giving
yourself time - to work out your goals, analyze what's holding you back,
decide how to overcome the obstacles and achieve what you want - is the
greatest love you can show yourself.
The Wise One Within Us
In the story, the Wise Man and the Turkey-Prince are two separate
characters. However it is also possible to see them as symbolic of two
separate facets of ourselves. We may be Princes or Princesses with our
own Turkey problems, but we also have a Wise One within ourselves - a
level of our being from where we are able to observe ourselves calmly
and clearly, without self-deception, to know what is really right for us
to do, and to take ourselves in hand and do it.
To reach our true fulfillment, we need to strengthen this Wise One
within us. We do this by studying the teachings of the outstanding Torah
guides at every opportunity, and asking seriously how they apply to us
and how we can put them into practice.
"With intelligence," said Rebbe Nachman, "you can stand up to all human
weaknesses... Everyone has the potential of wisdom. All that is
necessary is to actualize it... You may have succumbed to desire and
sinned in many ways. You may have damaged your intellect, making it
confused and weak, but you still have some intelligence, and with this
alone you can overcome all human weaknesses. One grain of intelligence
can overcome the world and all its temptations" (Rabbi Nachman's Wisdom
#51).
The Art of Sitting
The Wise Man went under the table, and the very first thing he did - his
first lesson - was just to sit there. You might have thought he would
have been anxious to get started and take the first steps in his plan to
cure the Prince. In fact, sitting was the first step.
Indeed, if you think about the story as a whole, you notice that most of
the time the Wise Man took to cure the Prince was spent just sitting
with him (interspersed with pulling at crumbs and bones, yelping like a
turkey, chatting etc.) The action - putting on the shirts and trousers,
and eating the royal food - accounted for only a small part of the total
time needed for the cure.
If you want to think clearly, you have to be able to sit. To find
lasting happiness, you must take time to think. You need to sit down and
calmly work out exactly how you want to live. You have to think about
who you are and what you want, and what your real goals should be. Then
you have to examine the various things you are actually doing in your
life, and ask whether they are leading you toward your goals or in fact
keeping you back from them. You have to work out practical programs for
attaining your goals and ambitions. It takes time to think about all
this. This is not something you can do in one session. You should invest
in regular, undisturbed, private sessions with yourself in order to do
it properly. This could be the single most important thing you do in
order to fulfill yourself in life and find HaShem.
Eating
As soon as those luscious tid-bits would start raining down from the
table, it was all go for the Turkey-Prince... darting here, racing
there, snatching, rabbing, stuffing, gobbling... Gastronomic bliss is
the acme of Turkey life.
The Prince's picking at crumbs and bones was more than just a symptom of
his madness. It was one of the main factors keeping him locked into it.
His compulsive feeding habits were just like a Turkey's, which in itself
must have made him feel like one. More than that, the crumbs and bones
and other junk food making up the Prince's diet merely provided more
fuel for the Turkey states of consciousness that were gripping his mind,
clouding over all awareness of his true essence.
In depicting how the crazy Prince spent his time pulling at crumbs and
bones, Rebbe Nachman was emphasizing the relationship between bad eating
habits and the lack of spirituality. "Eating properly subdues the
tendency towards folly, enhancing one's intellectual and spiritual
faculties... But when one over-indulges and eats like a glutton, folly
will get the upper hand and overcome one's intellectual and spiritual
faculties" (Likutey Moharan I:17,3).
Our culture is interested in the effect of diet on bodily health almost
to the point of obsession. Far less attention, however, is paid to the
effect of diet on the health of the mind and soul. Correct nutrition is
crucial to the health of the body, and bodily health is a vital factor
in mental and spiritual health. Moreover, the food we eat is not merely
a physical substance. Everything in the creation contains "Divine
sparks" - spiritual energy. When we eat and digest our food, not only
does the body extract the substances it needs to build and fuel itself.
At the same time subtle energies in the food rise to the brain and soul,
influencing our states of mind, our thoughts, feelings, words and
actions.
"Our states of mind," says Rebbe Nachman, "directly correspond to the
food we eat. When the body is pure, the mind is clear and one is able to
think properly and know what to do in life. But impurities in the body
cause putrid gases to rise up to the brain, throwing the mind into such
confusion that it becomes impossible to think straight" (Likutey Moharan
I:61,1). So direct is the effect of what we eat on how we think and feel
that Rebbe Nachman, speaking about the relationship of food and dreams,
tells us that "if a person were to eat his second spoonful before his
first, he would have a didream" (ibid. I:19, end).
The kinds of food we eat, in what quantities, when and how we eat them,
can all have a decisive influence on our energy levels, moods,
attitudes, ability to think, feel and so on. Eating the wrong foods, or
even the right foods in the wrong ways, can be responsible for excessive
fatigue, drowsiness, general sluggishness, depression, mental
cloudiness, nervousness, tension, anxiety, impulsiveness, excitability,
etc.
Renewal: A Kavanah for Breathing
The root meaning of the Hebrew word kavanah is aiming or directing, as
when an archer aims an arrow. In Jewish spiritual literature, a kavanah
is a thought one has in mind while saying a prayer or performing a holy
action, a mitzvah or good deed. One directs the mind by focusing on a
particular thought.
Rebbe Nachman has given us a very simple kavanah for breathing - a
thought we can have in mind as we breathe, a thought we can return to
any time, as we go through our normal activities each day and in special
periods of meditation.
The idea is to focus on breathing as renewal. We never stop breathing -
we are constantly letting out stale air and drawing in fresh air. Rebbe
Nachman tells us that the physical air we breathe in and out has a
spiritual cognate. There is the good, fresh, holy air from which the
Tzaddik draws energy, and the bad, stale, impure air that gives rise to
sin.
In order to renew yourself and draw closer to God, you must separate
yourself from the bad air and breathe in the good air. When a person
dies, he gives a long sigh and the life goes out of him. In a sense,
every exhale is a death: the death of the moment that has passed, as we
breathe out the stale air. This death is a preparation for rebirth: the
birth of the new moment.
When you breathe out, sigh and exhale all the stale air from within you,
bearing in mind that you are releasing yourself from the bad air of
impurity. Then, as you breathe in again, focus on how you are drawing in
fresh, pure, good air and binding yourself to holiness and life. Sigh
over the things you have done wrong in your life, and breathe out the
stale, impure air that is inside you and affecting your mind. Breathe
out your tensions and bad feelings. Breathe in the good, fresh air of
holiness. Breathe in new life. This is a way to return from impurity to
holiness (Tzaddik #163).
You can use this kavanah any time you focus on your breathing at various
junctures in the course of your day, as discussed above. If you use it
regularly, you will have a constant sense of revitalization as you
become more and more alive with every breath and each new moment.
Prayer
Prayer is a grossly misunderstood activity. The primary connotation of
the English word "pray" is to request, and this has led to a widespread
image of prayer as being centered around asking for things - health,
wealth, success, and so on. Prayer is often thought of as a form of
quasi-magic resorted to by the primitive and ignorant in an effort to
overcome their helplessness in the face of overwhelming natural forces.
For many people religious prayer rituals are meaningless, antiquated,
formal ceremonies conducted in a language they do not understand, and
having nothing to do with their inner selves and personal issues.
It is largely forgotten that up until our great-grandparents' generation
many people found it quite natural to talk directly and spontaneously to
God in their own native language, discussing all their needs and pouring
out their hearts. For the majority of people today, the very idea of
talking directly to God in your own words is mystifying, awkward, and
unreal. God is so awesome and far away. How are you supposed to talk to
Him? How could God be interested in all our petty needs and problems? In
any case, if God knows everything, including our thoughts, why is it
necessary to talk to Him? Besides, what kind of conversation is it? When
you talk to a person, you see their reactions, and hear what they have
to say. How does God answer?
But "it is not in the Heavens... The word is very close to you, in your
mouth and in your heart to do it" (Deuteronomy 30:12-14). Prayer does
not have to mean speaking to God "out there." It can be as direct and
intimate as talking to your own heart. If you look at the actual content
of many of the Psalms and prayers of the Siddur, although prayers of
request and petition, especially for spiritual illumination, have a
prominent place, they are only one aspect of prayer. There are also many
descriptions of God's works and activities in nature and history -
praises, thanks and acknowledgement - because recognizing God's active
presence in our lives and the world around us is one of the most
important ways of experiencing our connection with Him.
In addition to prayers to God or statements about Him, the Psalms in
particular give intimate voice to the innermost thoughts and feelings of
the spiritual seeker in every phase of the search - introspection and
self-judgment; happiness about the good in oneself, regret about the
bad; the struggle with evil instincts; fears, doubts and questions; the
joy of devotion; reverence, love, awe and yearning for God, and so on.
Another important part of prayer is affirmation: we repeatedly remind
ourselves of our faith, hope and trust in God; we exhort ourselves
against fear, demoralization and despair; and we set our minds on the
qualities of justice and righteousness, kindness and mercy that we want
to cultivate in our lives.
God's first words to Avraham, founder of the Jewish People, were: "Lech
lecha - go to yourself" (Genesis 12:1). The essence of the spiritual
journey is to go deep into ourselves in order to discover and draw out
the Princely higher self from where it is buried amongst our Turkey
identities, thoughts and feelings - to draw it out, express it and bring
it to perfection. We accomplish this through prayer - talking directly
to the heart and soul, that is to say, the self, in our own words.
Ultimately prayer and self-communion must meet, because the self - the
soul - derives from God: the soul is "a part of God above" (Job 31:2).
Thus the more we discover and develop our spiritual side, the more the
Divine Presence manifests itself in us, and we begin to experience just
how intimately we are bound up with God in our essence, and how close at
hand He is in our thoughts and feelings and consciousness.
In the works of Rebbe Nachman, our main source of teaching about
hisbodidus, the practice is often called conversation between oneself
and one's Owner. One might say that the conversation is always somewhere
in between ourselves and God - sometimes more with ourselves, sometimes
more with God.
Thus in one discussion, Rebbe Nachman characterizes our relationship
with God during hisbodidus as that of "a child pleading with his
father... omplaining and pestering him. How good it is when you can
awaken your heart and plead until tears stream from your eyes and you
stand like a little child crying before its Father" (Rabbi Nachman's
Wisdom #7). Elsewhere, Rebbe Nachman suggests that we should talk to God
"like a person speaks to his friend" (Exodus 33:11, see Likutey Moharan
II:99) - discussing things frankly and earnestly, heart to heart, in
order to work everything out. In another lesson, Rebbe Nachman tells us
to try talking directly to ourselves, literally addressing the different
parts of ourselves and even the limbs of the physical body, guiding and
training ourselves to do what we want and live as we should (Tzaddik
#442).
Out Loud
One of the essential problems we all face is a multitude of conflicting
voices. The whole world confronts us with a clamor of cries and messages
demanding our attention - from the people around us to the
ringingtelephones, beepers, adverts, signs, slogans... "Hey there! Stop!
Go! Come here! Do this! Don't do that!" One may try to close out the
external distractions by going to a quiet location. But as soon as one
looks inside one's private inner world, there is an endless parade of
thoughts, images, sensations, impulses, needs, desires, anxieties,
fears, strategies, plans, etc.
The Prince in us sends one set of messages, but the Turkey vies for our
attention with a constant stream of urgent messages of its own. One
wants to study... but suddenly one has an irresistible urge to eat,
sleep, or read the papers, etc. One wants to pray and meditate calmly...
but all kinds of things need attending to, so one has to rush. One wants
to be kind and patient with others... but somehow there seem to be so
many good reasons for getting irritated and angry. The most insidious
inner talk the Turkey feeds us is endless negative commentary about our
life experiences, the people we encounter and the things they do, or,
worst of all, about our very selves.
The way to overcome the Turkey voice is by raising your own voice - the
voice you really want to hear and follow. By repeating out loud the
things you know to be true - what you want most deeply in life, how
important your goals are to you, and how you plan to achieve them - you
strengthen the very aspects of your personality that you want to
cultivate, and lead yourself to where you need to go. When you raise
your voice, your attention follows: the words you say aloud become the
focus of your thoughts.
At times you may need to find your true voice, because your true self,
the self you are searching for, may be buried behind years of
repression, shyness, embarrassment, poor self-esteem, negativity,
self-neglect and the like. You have to fan the flames of your nascent
self, learning to express new, tender, unfamiliar feelings. Sometimes
you may have to dredge out voices from way back in your past, or
experiment with new voices. One of the most important voices to search
for is the voice of song - your own song of joy, love and devotion to
God.
When you speak out loud, it is not only the talking that's important,
but also hearing what you say. If you only think your thoughts, they may
fly through your mind so quickly that they remain vague and incoherent
and eventually just disappear. When you say them out loud, the very act
of articulating them forces you to clarify them. You hear what you have
said and it makes an impact. Sometimes when you hear what you are
saying, you realize it isn't quite right. You have to develop the idea
further, express yourself more clearly. You redefine what you want to
say and examine it again, until you are saying exactly what you want to
say. This is the way you learn to think and talk more clearly and
effectively.
In mystical literature, speech is called malchut - rule and power. Not
only can you use words to tell others what you want them to do. You can
also use them to direct and program yourself. When you want to think
about a given issue, formulate a question and say it over to yourself,
as the Wise Man had the Prince ask himself, "Who are you?" This is a
method of concentrating on the issue you want to think about. As you
work out which aspects of yourself you most want to develop or change,
express what you want to achieve in simple formulas and use them to
direct yourself toward your goal. For example, when you want to relax
your body, you can shine the torch of your consciousness to each of your
muscle groups in turn and gently whisper "Relax." If you want to change
your eating habits, develop affirmations that you repeat to yourself in
the kitchen or at the table, and so on.
Use your voice to create the atmosphere you want to live in. Even when
you find yourself surrounded by negativity, you can whisper positive
messages to yourself: "Peace, calm, kindness..." When you want to
elevate your spiritual awareness and heighten your consciousness of God,
simply say "God," "HaShem" or "Ribono shel Olam"-( etc. out loud to
yourself again and again. Hum your favorite melodies of joy and
devotion. Listen to the melody as you sing: let it fill your entire
consciousness, and lift you to a higher plane. |
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